Congratulations! You are now prepared for the zombie apocalypse.

"Random number generator" generates this:

Which means Eligible Comment Number Four, which means

of Through the looking glass is will soon be the proud owner of this:

You'll be contacted shortly! Thanks to everyone else for participating. You can go back to not reading my blog now!

for the camera

I smiled in June because of

• Slaughterhouse-Five by Kurt Vonnegut
• highly pigmented cheap lipstick that is equivalent to wearing a banner that says "I'm dressed! Give me what you've got, world!"
  
• singing belting in the shower
• the very nice PG&E people I talked to
• Ash Stymest (please tell me he is not real or I will develop even more unrealistic expectations for the men in my life; photos from the fashion spot)
  

• the new toaster!
• not slicing my finger off cutting an apple for the first time
• Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
• spinach and cheese omelets
• being entirely unproductive and feeling very little guilt about it
• The Omnivore's Dilemma
• the tour cast of Spring Awakening because they crack me up, and the boys of Spring Awakening because, it is true, they are infinitely cuter than puppies
  
• strawberries, blueberries, cherry tomatoes, nectarines, apricots, produce in general
  
• Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
• Nutella, spread of the gods
  
• Coco, my cousin's new dog, because she reminds me of an excitable little old man
  
• steak, grilled onions, grilled okra, and biryani for a somewhat unconventional barbecue
  
• Hairspray music
• Breaking Dawn, or at least what I have read of it, embarrassingly enough
  
• San Francisco tap water, because you can actually drink it and get it in your eyes
  
• finishing my play, and Victoria for beta-reading
• bedhead, bedhead, bedhead!
• that there's a place off Ocean Avenue where I used to sit and talk with you
• In the Flesh, the Spring Awakening companion book
• Granny Smith apples with cinnamon
• East of Eden, which is going so so well
  
• edamame
• texting the same thing at the same time by accident
• my new basil plant
• Juicy Couture perfume, which dries down to something honeysuckle and heavenly
• the girl at Trader Joe's who liked my glasses
• my haircut, like hell

It just occurred to me that this post is tagged as "things i love" and "boys." I feel that every "things i love" post should include boys. I will work on this.

LAST CALL!

If you would like to win this scarf, leave a comment on THIS POST. Ends 11:59 PM (PDT) of July 2! Which is tomorrow! Winners will be contacted. Watch the front page.

Ernestine

This is what I wore to sit in a waiting room reading East of Eden and to buy my potted basil (whom I have christened Ernestine). I hope Ernestine flourishes so I can move her to the apartment, but as far as green thumbs go, mine is probably more like…a flamethrower, and not even a color.

Above, outerwear: mother’s. Floral button-down: American Rag. Sweater: Ann Taylor Loft, mother’s. Shorts: Nordstrom Rack. Tights: BP Nordstrom. Shoes: Steve Madden.

Ahh… I love good tights.

LEVEL UP!

So I thought I was, you know, on my way to something awesome when I took this progress shot:

See the pleats? See the floral? Things were working out for me. I was going to starch it and twirl around pretending to channel Prada/Resort several years late and…

...it might look fine, but there are all sorts of things wrong with it. How like a man.

Alas. This was an EPIC FAIL! Because

1. I haven’t the first clue about girls. No, really. What are these curves you speak of? Oh, is that why the waistband doesn’t lie flat? I thought that angling it in the back would help. No? No… I guess I should go back to the same pattern I drafted years ago that has proven to be the only one that works. Note to self: Eyeballing… does not work.
2. I am completely out of fabric. This is what happens when I decide to add a fatty bow to the back, thus effectively using up anything I might have used to salvage whatever Frankengarment I came up with.
3. No, really, what are hips? I have some? That’s also why the zipper doesn’t lie flat? And is that why I am struggling to put this on? What do you mean measure?

On the bright side, I am sure I know how to rethread my sewing machine now (my own sewing machine, not one of the three industrial ones downstairs), and my backstitching is really even, and the zipper (though hand-sewn as usual because I couldn’t find my zipper foot) is nicely hidden, and pleating and ironing are always fun.

(Did I just say that?)

Whatever, this is going into my bag of failure (because I have a huge bag of sewing failures) and will count as +5 EXP for me.

what a catch

Of course I have terrible taste in music! I'm embarrassed to like Fall Out Boy, I really am, but I could not care (much) less.

like, omg?

Ugh, ugh, ugh, have I mentioned how inadequate people like Matt Doyle make me feel?

From an album that includes these lyrics: "Hey little boy / would you like a ride? / A lollipop? / A puppy? / How about a baseball bat? / There's one in my pants."



ALSO! Rent. Curran. October. Be there.

darling, why do you press your knees together?

Yes and yes.

Above, Princess Acrylic Necklace, $14.80 at Forever21

Above, Eclectic Sequin Bib Necklace, $17.80 at Forever21

anticipation

The links have not been feeling loved lately, so here you go:

• The prettiest butter I have ever seen, at Sunday Suppers.
  
• From the author of The Demon's Lexicon, a tragic short story/backstory on one character. It tugs at my heartstrings, it really does, which is saying something because I got invested in little Gerald in such a short amount of time. Of text.
  
• yellow is bangin'
  
• "It’s not surprising I look 16 – in my head I still feel 16 – and that feels a good age to be. I’ve never had to grow up. I’m still a big kid really." I forgot Rupert Grint was 20.
• Emma Watson is a darling. "When I was little, I didn’t understand that other kids thought I actually was Hermione, really geeky. It was devastating. I thought no one would ever fancy me."

darling, don’t think I take your murder lightly

So thanks to Cathy and Amanda, two of my plays are going to be performed this year! This may be minor news to you, but for me, there is a very limited number of things more satisfying than seeing something you thought would only ever be words on a page become an actual performance that (at least a handful of) people take seriously. (The necessary handful being the director(s) and actors.)

The first one, I wrote last year. It’s a crack!script riddled with Shakespeare references taken out of context and involves a man in love with a portrait of Shakespeare, a girl who pads her butt, and a lot of tragic death.

The second one, I just finished this past month. It’s about Harry Potter being treated like the Bible (this premise is TK’s, not mine, but he wanted to write a book with me about it and it never happened…so I stole it), but is really just a thinly veiled criticism of blind followers of religion (blind followers, not just followers) and sounds awfully Melchi Gabor, if you ask me. If it’s any indication, I’ve had “All That’s Known” stuck in my head for a while now. Anyway, I am stupidly happy with this one because it is the longest play I have written to date, it is serious, and it is plotty. Much plottier than anything I have ever written.

The point is, one of my friends Nate has been cast in both of them:

I get all warm and fuzzy inside knowing that the same friend who dedicated a slightly off-key rendition of “Grand Theft Autumn” to me is going to be playing a Creeper who has a sick interest in children and an extremely lecherous man named René!